PERCHANCE he for whom this bell tolls may be so ill, as that he knows not it tolls for him; and perchance I may think myself so much better than I am, as that they who are about me, and see my state, may have caused it to toll for me, and I know not that.There is no shame in trying and failing. And if the stress of continuing to strive is killing you, leaving your two young boys without the father they need to grow up with, the greater sin is continuing to strive. That you have tried your best is enough; well done, thou good and faithful servant. It's time now to put your life before your Party. Take a long break. Write a book. Come back to take your seat in the Lords when all the fuss and change is over. You can serve your country better now by calling it quits; despite Prescott's silliness, you're not indispensible - no-one is. And not even your political enemies would relish the corpse-pallor of Rowson's cartoons becoming a reality.