Friday, 5 September 2008

PETA cranks up the Bass

This hasn't been my best Sea Bass season ever. The score is Bass 1 Raedwald 0. That old warrior from another place, Major Catastrophe, must have been casting his Bass Exclusion Zone over the waters. Still, PETA would be happy. 'Fish have feelings, too' was a recent campaign of theirs; we anglers are cruel monsters, and if only fish could speak they'd tell tales of brutal hooks and a violation of fishy rights. And they haven't even started on the associated horror of worm-drowning ...

At least when these cranks are 'defending' fish or worms they're not wasting the time of defence ministers. The Canadian government cull around 10,000 black bears a year on sound environmental grounds. The British government buy 20 or 30 skins a year from these to make headwear for the sovereign's regiments of guards. The skins would doubtless otherwise be shipped to Chinese soft-toy factories to make thousands of cute furry things for the infants of the far east.

Right. Must go and reset the squirrel trap - the first half of tonight's supper has just arrived.


Anonymous said...

Don't eat squirrels. You'll catch something.

Alfred the Ordinary said...

Do catch squirrels, you'll eat something, and avoid exceeding your annual quota for Sea Bass, for which DEFRA has some particularly nasty punishment, I'm sure.

Brunswick stew is yummy -
Slowly stew the squirrels with butter, onions, stale bread and seasoning in a large iron pot.