Friday, 8 May 2009

Gordon's cleaner's contract explained

Contrary to speculation in the media, there is nothing sinister or untoward in the fact that the cleaner was paid for 3 hours a week for Andrew's flat but 7 hours a week for Gordon's. The differences are easily explained as follows;

Andrew's flat
  • Cleaning - 3 hours

Gordon's flat
  • Cleaning - 3 hours
  • Filling in and reporting Gordon's cleaning performance indicators, creating and reporting local performance indicators, attending meetings with external performance indicator auditors and benchmarking cleaning performance with the cleaners at Numbers 34 and 38 - 1 hour
  • Sustainable procurement of cleaning products in accordance with Sarah's Code of Practice for toilet and bathroom creams, liquids and polishes, silicone waxes and sprays for furniture, anionic surfectant products for colloidal grease removal and the programmed switching-on of electrical odourisation devices - 1 hour
  • Attending diversity and equalities training, COSHH training, safe use of dusters in confined environments etc - 1 hour
  • Attending focus groups of selected guests of Gordon and Sarah to ascertain their aspirations for the development of cleaning standards and services in the Brown flat - 1 hour
See. Nothing sinister there at all.


The Great Simpleton said...

You forgot sweeping up Nokia bits and repairing damage to walls.

John M Ward said...

Thank you for that explanation. It was very helpful. I shall link to this in one of my own articles in a minute or two as it is so valuable.