Thursday, 17 June 2010

Von Rumpy cruising for a slap

He may have all the looks and charisma of a back-street abortionist, but rumpled Herr Von Rumpy is a Federast to his core. He's trying to get a measure through that would oblige the UK government to submit its budget for approval to, er, Von Rumpy, before the Chancellor announces his measures to the House.

As Cameron flies out for the EU summit he might ponder the consequences if Sir John Simon had to submit his budget for Herr Ribbentrop's approval in 1938.

"Er, Herr Von Ribbentrop, I see you've halved our War Department funding"

"Ja. Europe is entering a new age of united peace and prosperity and such spending is not necessary"

"... and you're closing all our Mediterranean bases and withdrawing the Fleet from Gibraltar"

"Ja; a new Euro Navy under the flag of Chermany will take over these responsibilities"

".. and you're reducing the size of our fishing fleet by 80% whilst allowing Generalissimo Franco's trawlers to fish right up to our foreshore"

"Zeze fishes is European fishes! Gott in Himmel, you arrogant Englanders think you own even ze fishes! Chermany will show you! In future you will buy your own fish from Spain in the interests of the New European Order!"

4 comments:

Blue Eyes said...

It's a laughable proposal. Even if enacted (unlikely!) it will work just as well as the Growth and Stability Pact did: the Greeks will lie, the Italians and French will hide stuff off the books and the Germans and Dutch will go on paying for other people's mistakes.

Anonymous said...

And I think the point is....

All these things have come to pass in peace time.

Budgie said...

Just a passing point: Bird's Eye fish fingers are made in Churmany now, not Hull as they used to be. Ze drem vill Kum tru!

Roger Thornhill said...

@Blue Eyes,

It is not a laughable proposal, but all part of the steady move to financial and political integration.

Handing over the budgets is a psychological move. Even if the EU says nothing about them, for now, the precedent is set, the EU is known to have seen it first. Numbers can leak. Positions can be taken.

Handing over the budget is like making the schoolboy go fetch the cane - it forces the subordinate to be complicit.

We should either give them the bird or just hand over bogus figures and let them know as much.