That traditional annual sporting event, the FIFA - IOC Derby for the title of the most bent corrupt bastards on the planet has got off to a fine start this year. FIFA immediately went ahead on news that Qatar had bribed every single FIFA member with traditional cash in €500 notes and had additionally provided them with several kilos of cocaine, Polish whores and a Thai ladyboy in order to secure their nomination. The International Olympic Committee made a spirited return with news that half of them had approached the Lord Chamberlain to ask about the going rate for a Knighthood each, others had already sold places in the Zil cavalcade to Mexican drug barons and one had approached a British actor known as a family man with an offer to push various objects up his bottom in return for IOC advertising work. Both teams have now issued a 'rate card' to clarify the expected cost of corruption, bent decisions, fixing the draws, nobbling races and selling the sexual favours of international athletes and, disturbingly, parathletes.
I just hope that whoever lets any of these loathsome slime slither their noisome way into the UK has the decency to organise a receiving line made up of convicted MPs, nonces and the scum of the prisons rather than anyone with a scruple of decency who might risk gagging at the stench of their foulness.