Sunday, 17 July 2011

I'm backing Murdoch

When MPs gather in committee on Tuesday they will be unable to contain all the built-up frustrated narcissism, the bloviated self-importance, the caustic self-interest and the barbs of rock-bottom public opinion; they will expose themselves as snarling, vicious, hateful, splenetic and spiteful bullies. If Heston Blumenthal applied his Nitrogen cylinder to human faeces to produce a frothing turd mousse of righteous indignation, the result would be indistinguishable from a committee-member MP next week. Their faces will bloat and empurple, veins will throb, sebaceous glands will drip grease from their lank locks, spittle froth will coat their lips and their pudgy little fists will clench as tightly as if holding an expenses form. These, readers, are our elected members. 


Before them in this kangaroo court will sit an 80 year-old man, looking slightly shrunken inside his clothes as do all the old, the liver spots visible on his balding head, his frail hands perhaps trembling slightly. He will be utterly contrite, apologetic and genuinely remorseful. He will be cowed, and the offensive and cruel aggression of his interrogators will make him flinch visibly at times. Still, he will exhibit virtuous behaviour; he will endure with courage and fortitude, he will not rise to the bait, and he will take all the painful blows from his tormentors with guts and stoicism.  


All of this will be recorded and broadcast in high definition video.


Guess who I think will come out of this better? 

19 comments:

Barnacle Bill said...

Even before Murdoch has appeared before this kangaroo court he has shown better moral judgement than his accusers.

measured said...

Experience counts for a lot. One side has more experience than all the others on the other side put together.

Anonymous said...

Murdoch is a businessman, innured in the fires of the cut and thrust of a 'daily' grind and though I'm no fan, he did it well - anybody can see that and good luck to him.

Twenty years ago, he'd have made these MPs eat their own waste, even yet, I can see no reason why he has to appear before this farcical trumped up bunch of sanctimonious patsys.

All I can say is, they'd better be polite, otherwise there'll be blood on the carpet.

Good on yer Rupert.

Quiet_Man said...

Murdoch I suspects knows where quite a few bodies are buried too. The MP's don't seem to be aware of the damage he could do them if they aren't careful to stick to the facts rather than attempt to try Murdoch in the court of public opinion.

Wordsmith Fan said...

"...their pudgy little fists will clench as tightly as if holding an expenses form."

This is what draws me to your blog time after time. Utter genius!

right_writes said...

Good post Raedwald and marvellous prose as Wordsmith Fan says... genius!

Agree mostly with the sentiment too, but Murdoch is no Howard Roark, as Anon says, less of a morally upstanding old gent, more a cutthroat businessman!

http://blogitics.org/2011/07/17/wheres-howard-roark-when-you-need-him/

(Shameless plug...)

Ed P said...

As his loathsome spawn & Ms Redtop will also be there, I suspect Rupe will do well, as you say. But at her expense - a scapegoat will be needed to assuage the baying hoards.

Anonymous said...

I do hope that Rupe takes full advantage of parliamentary privilege...

SimonF said...

What the Quiet_Man says. Those MPs had better remember the old adage about never asking a question to which you don't know the answer.

David C said...

Would that you will be proved right, Raedwald, but in my view you're reckoning without the biased media, who will distill the whole thing down to an untruthful anti-essence showing the MPs as paragons of virtue and Murdoch as the antichrist. Haven't you noticed the coverage we've been getting over the last week or so?

Smoking Hot said...

It's beginning to sound like the Senate War Investigating Commitee with Howard Hughes in '47. l expect a similar outcome.

Just an onlooker said...

Becky's been arrested it is said. Can she still appear? Is this a cunning plot by the fuzz to stop her revealing the contents of her handbag?

Gordon the Fence Post Tortoise said...

Old Rupe's got a few skeletons of his own in the cupboard especially relating to the assisted demise of the ITV Sport Digital channel and his boy's involvement in the hacking and subsequent manufacture and distribution of ITV pirate crypto cards.

That said, I hope he can manage a burp once he's swallowed them whole...

DP111 said...

Raedwald

Absolutely terrific post. If any of our MPs could read it without moving their lips, they would shrivel up and die.

Gandalf at UP Pompeii is also up in arms

http://uppompeii1.uppompeii.com/2011/07/17/the-fifth-reich.aspx

Gandalf said...

Great writing,

Rebecca has been put on a plate by the Bilderberg group, she is meat for the MSM to devour, Murdoch is a key player in this group.

She will not be able to testify in case it impugns the police inquiry - she has been effectively shut up

Anonymous said...

tomorrow is another day.
Rup will have his way.

Greg Tingey said...

I'm assuming that this post is meant to be ... erm ... IRONIC?

Murdoch is deeply unpleasant person, making Citizen Kane look like someone nice to know.

I am really hoping that thw hole house of cards collapses

john in cheshire said...

I suspect this is going to be Mr Murdoch's Tony Hayward moment. And like the American version, once the furore dies down, Mr Murdoch will be seen to have not been as bad or negligent as his detractors would have us believe. If the socialists destroy News Corp/News International, then who's to oppose the bbc/guardeen version of events? Not Trinity News Group, that's for sure. Wikipedia also lists TNG as Britains largest publishers, so Mr Murdoch doesn't have the near monopoly that the bbc and guardeen claque would have you believe.

Anonymous said...

Wonderful prose... one of your finest!