You won't know who Hugh Robertson is. None of the staff at the London Olympics did either, which prompted an indignant 'Don't you know who I am?' from Mr Robertson. They shuffled their feet a bit and shook their heads. It had to be explained that Mr Robertson was the Minister for Sports and Tourism; in fact they had to keep pictures of him pinned up to remind them. He's got the sort of immediately forgettable face that bank robbers would long to own. His own children have been known to miss him in a pub car park. When he sits in senior DCMS meetings the chairman always starts with 'Let's just go round the table and introduce ourselves ...'
Anyhow, here's a tip for Mr Robertson from his fellow Tourism Minister for the Spanish Balearics, Carlos Delgado; have yourself pictured with a fresh pair of deer's balls on your head. Then Tweet it. Snr Delgado's domestic profile has risen significantly since (although there's always the risk that he may now be greeted with an 'Oh sorry, I didn't recognise you without your testicles'). Go on, Mr Robertson, what have you got to lose?