Wednesday, 16 April 2014

Salmond's new Scots Army

With the real costs of maintaining independent armed forces being made clear, Alex Salmond's dreams of a Scots army are looking increasingly unrealistic. Instead of an army equivalent to that of Norway or Sweden, it's looking more like Scotland can only afford one to rival Luxembourg. Still, Luxembourg uses it's contribution of an infantry company to claim a place at the table of both NATO and the Eurocorps command, and though having no air force, offers 'Amazon' registration to NATO's 18 AWACS aircraft. 

The new battalion-sized Scots army could include an artillery company with two or three old field guns for firing ceremonial salutes as well as preserving the identity of the historic Scots regiments at platoon or section level; The Cameronians could be reconstituted as ten men under the command of a corporal from Perth, wearing the distinctive Douglas tartan and so forth. A parade of the full battalion would therefore be a festive occasion, a multiplicity of colourful tartans, and even the guns could be painted in a clan-neutral Burberry check. 

Historic Scots uniform could be revived
The Royal Company of Archers, a subscription club that currently forms the sovereign's bodyguard in Scotland, could be placed on an operational footing to add to military capacity. In return for membership fees, every officer in the corps currently ranks as a general, and every private as a colonel. This may cause some minor problems with NATO integration, but modern military commanders will no doubt come to value a sturdy body of middle-aged accountants with stout yew bows and arrows on their flank when facing a schwerpunkt of Russian armour. The suggestion that the historic uniform of the Royal Company (illustrated) could be adopted as the No 1 full dress of the new Scots army also has much to commend it. All in all, I think Salmond's onto a winner here.

11 comments:

Sniper said...

Typical English bias. What about the Atholl Highlanders? That'll serve ye!

Anonymous said...

The ability to maintain a standing army is a result of a strong economy. If that goes, so goes the military capability.

Weekend Yachtsman said...

The Royal Company of Archers are hilarious actually.

Made up, as you say, of largely middle-aged non-military men - Yahs every one of them without exception - they are "drilled" on formal occasions by a regular NCO whose terminal frustration at their utter incompetence is quite evident even through the professional veneer.

Even had they arrows in their bows, there is not a rabbit in the kingdom who need worry about them in the slightest.

Demetrius said...

Make love not war. They could go around giving Glasgow Kisses Rab C style.

Votefor said...

You could begin by trying to reconcile the numbers in the following lists ,
http://www.royalnavy.mod.uk/About-the-Royal-Navy/Organisation/Senior-Naval-Staff

http://www.royalnavy.mod.uk/The-Fleet/Ships

Why would Scots ever think they could run armed forces , when the MOD is clearly worldclass at it. My suggestion for naval uniforms in the RUK navy would be that of what is worn currently by admirals!

John M said...

Salmond hardly needs an army does he. I mean who the hell wants to invade Scotland?

If he does need an army, it's going to be needed to control the rival fans when Rangers arrive back in the SPL, and to control the rioters when his economy goes bang...

Anonymous said...

Small point. In the Royal Artillery a battery sub-divides a regiment, not a company.

Typically three (field) gun batteries - the fighting part of the regiment - plus a HQ (Head Quarters) battery in reserve.

Take 29 Commando Reg RA, equipped with the 105mm L119 'Light Gun':

7 Battery (Sphinx)

79 Battery (Kirkee)

8 Battery (Alma)

148 Forward Observation Battery (Meiktila)

Steve

Budgie said...

"... when his economy goes bang..."

When Salmond's economy goes bang - he will blame the English.

Weekend Yachtsman said...

What Budgie said.

G. Tingey said...

Salmond's "economy" will belly-flop with unbelievable speed if the Scots are bullied into voting for him ...
And with astounding speed, too.
Like every major firm will be well out of Scotland with all lower-level employees sacked, probably within a couple of months of a "yes" vote .....

What bothers me is the way that people are being threatened & marginalised by the SNP louts for even mildly expressing support for the Union.

It is to be profoundly hoped that he gets less than 40% of the vote - which will kill it......
Better still if he gets less thna 30%
However, the vote on Wlesh devolution sets a worrying precedent - lots of people didn;t bother to turn out & the Plaid-loonies just scraped it.
NOT a good omen

James Higham said...

There needs to be an Edward on our throne first.