Saturday, 10 May 2014

Miliband speaks for the Common Man

"Good evening. I want to tell you this evening why you should vote Labour - the party of the Common Man. For many of you faced with the price of basics such as Focaccia and Virgin Olive Oil, or bottles of white asparagus or Southwold marsh Samphire, you will know already how rising prices have forced you to cut back on the hours that Nanny does, or even to postpone a simple night out at the theatre with a two course supper at St John's. .

Some of you may even have delayed settling your wine merchant's account, or contemplated switching to VDP from AOC. This is the fault of the Tories, who have squeezed the number of public jobs paying over a hundred-kay to the point where many of you are having to work. My own partner had to let go of a driver recently, as even paying minimum wage she couldn't afford both of them. One more Tory unemployed. One more Guatemalan out of work.

If you elect labour we will abolish VAT on food, books and newspapers; nothing is more important than encouraging reading and good food. We will install Jamie as our Food Tsar, to bring braised trotter stuffed with game terrine to all corners of the UK and an end to food banks. I know all about the challenges faced by the Common Man - and you can rely on me."


right_writes said...

I hope the other driver is still employed...

It's a long way from Hampstead to Smithfield.

Anonymous said...

Whimsical but close to the truth. When the news was announced that lenders would be adopting more stringent checks on potential borrowers' finances, examples quoted by London-based analysts were "the cost of your monthly wine club, gym membership ..." etc., etc.
Ah, the world of the everyday.

Anonymous said...

Would Miliband, get it?

I wonder, if he has ever visited and gone shopping, perambulating talking, joshing, dickering with the market traders, gassing to folk, empathizing - in his 'home' town of Doncaster?

Perhaps, just gone for a walk in the quite wonderful green line of hills, of the Holderness.

Perish the thought of it, still less visited and maybe reflected, prayed even, in one of the scores of old churches, deep set in the villages of these hills. [or do I jest]

Has he ever sat, could Miliband be, silent in contemplation, feeling immersed in a shared history. A commonality, of hundreds of thousands of births, marriages, solemnly marked burial and with it the pain and suffering, or the joy of the harvest ritual - so important to our forebears.
All of it, imbued, engraved in the solid stone walls of Christianity in England.
Could he [Miliband] imagine and think back, sense it in his bones....feel part of the spirituality and be sharing - of the hopes, despair and disappointments, of life's very real hardships.
Aye, for these people came from nothing, had very little and died poor, only working the land, kith and Church were theirs to hold.
In an ancient church one can lose oneself, in some very old and beautiful churches along the routes of Yorkshire - all of which are inextricably linked and nigh on next to and part of, his own Yorkshire constituency?

Indeed, has he ever breathed in the air and revelled in his shared and proud of nationality and thought - "in my blood, of my bones and this is my country"?

Can he feel England? Can he?
Does this empty man, know England, be of England?

What do you think?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said @ 09:44

'Does this empty man, know England, be of England?'

No, is the short answer.

He has no ancestry whatsoever in these islands, leave alone England. Socialism "is my religion" he said last year, clarifying his atheism. He wants a socialist society - in fact he will insist on it so expect a raft of legislation similar to the laws in Sweden.


It is a criminal offence to criticize 'diversity' in Sweden.


Demetrius said...

Ah, food for thought. Time for our takeaway pizza, too much trouble to go to the fish and chip shop.

Ed P said...

Why do the bottom-feeding idiots vote for this party of out-of-touch millionaires? Or either of the other two parties of out-of-touch millionaires.
Perhaps UKIP will actually awaken the sonambulant masses - once they realise the cynical disregard all these pols have for them there could be actual progress. Otherwise a repeat of 1789 will be necessary.

Anon 2 said...

He's a foreigner ... probably from the same country as Dracula, if looks are anything to go by.

And he has absolutely nothing in common with anything related to our Donny.

[Otherwise] a repeat of 1789 will be necessary. .. Well he won't know what that means either, even if he survives it.

Cascadian said...

Two very good pieces of writing on the same topic - a rarity (that is not criticism).

Well done Raedwald and Anonymous 09:44, and if I could write like you anon I would be signing my name, it's simple enough, click name/URL at the bottom, dream up a suitable moniker,ignore the URL thing which I think deters most people from signing, and enjoy your notoriety.

Milliband?-spit, as Anon describes, he is just another parachuted candidate of the metrosexual elite, would not know a household budget from a garbage bag, both are unknown to him.

Anonymous said...

@Anon 09:44 - that was a wonderful rallying call to our countrymen and a joyful rebuttal of all those who would try to deny us our heritage. I'm a Cheshire man and I feel the same every time I walk the sandstone ridge along the Sandstone trail. My surname is the same as the small hamlet of 135 people that nestles between Macclesfield and Knutsford and it has been that way since one of my ancient forebears founded it back in 1066 - we get a mention in the Domesday Book of 1086. How dare any metrosexual powder-puff even try to put a stop to my heritage!

Milliband wouldn't know the difference between an Englishman and a Zeppelin.

Coney Island