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Saturday, 28 March 2020

Droning on

Back in March 2017 we joked (below) about suggestions that the police would waste public money and take bobbies off the beat by forming and training new 'drone squads'. Well, truth of course is stranger than fiction these days, and dog walkers and solitary hikers out in the lonely wastes of the national parks have been buzzed by police drones. They exist. Who knew?

They were, of course, subject to the law. Gareth Corfield (@GazTheJourno) has questioned whether the use of drones, in particular by the Derbyshire Police, was not in violation of the Air Navigation Order 2016 - and there are compelling questions for the police to answer about the qualifications of those controlling these drones, their compliance with the law and the professional standards we should expect in their use. And I would expect such guidance to be agreed between ministers in the Home Office and Department of Transport, not concocted by the fatuous and self-styled 'College of Policing', which the public do not recognise as having any democratic or legislative legitimacy.

These secret drones will not be the last of the State's little surprises that this virus will bring out of the closet.

Anyhow, it's Saturday, the Sun is shining and here again is that whimsical piece from 2017


"So, Inspector, this proposed Drone Squad can be staffed by transfers from the Internet Porn Squad? How's that gone?"

"Well sir since 2004 the lads have watched over 2 million hours of online porn. Deserve a medal, they do sir. Constable Hotchkiss can't hear the word 'Brazilian' now without twitching."

"And how many arrests and convictions have resulted?"

"Just the one sir. The chairman of the golf club who put hidden cameras in the ladies. But that doesn't affect the deterrent effect of those evil film makers knowing that the Force is watching. And we've learnt our lesson - the lads need periodic rotation out of the squad. Hence the new Drone Squad, sir"

"Ah yes. Sergeant Thom bought one for his kids and saw the crime-busting possibilities straight away...."

"That's right sir. Of course, police drones would cost a lot more, it being taxpayers' money, and the lads would need professional training from the RAF"

"I'm still not happy about us flying these potentially lethal things over people's houses and gardens .. have you considered the risks?"

"We estimate that 80% of the time we'll be flying over public roads and open land. In particular it will allow the lads to gather video evidence of widespread 'dogging' activity in Knickers Woods, sir. We could spend a year keeping constant tabs on it all then swoop. Then there's the poofs sorry BLTs on Handy Heath. We can follow 'em sir from the sky without risking officers on the ground."

"You don't think there's a risk that some of this footage may leak onto the web? Doesn't this sort of surveillance constitute a variety of porn in itself?"

"That's the beauty of it sir. The Internet Porn Squad can keep an eye out for any leaked footage"

"Ah yes. When was the last time any of these men actually pounded a beat or responded to a disturbance? Some of them look as though they have difficulty walking"

"Yes sir. Injuries incurred in the line of service, watching the porn sir. Sixteen early ill-health retirements so far. We're hoping that working the drones gets them out of their chairs, sir. Into other chairs."

"Very well. Carry on, Inspector"


Doonhamer said...

Was that before HATE crime was even a bleak in a mission creeper'eye?

Dave_G said...

I've never seen anything so draconian, intrusive nor objectionable than the footage of drones harassing the public for simply walking (their dog etc). Plod can fuck off with that kind of approach and I'd be happy to investigate emp guns and subminiature guided missiles to take them out if found over my premises/land.

When is enough enough? The 'slow creep' to totalitarianism is becoming a gallop and the disgraceful scenes of officers shouting in someone's face to "go home" does nothing to promote public/police acceptance - indeed the very principle of policing by approval is long gone and it's time we took back control.

This 'emergency' is showing me, at least, what the REAL emergency is - and it's nothing to do with the over exaggeration of a 'flu'.

Doonhamer said...

How did text prediction calculate that when I tapped out "gleam", I really wanted "bleak"?
And all in the picosecond as I tapped publish.

sok said...

Drone or no drone, England really is a beautiful place. have a great day all)


John in Cheshire said...

If one of these police drones was flying over someone's land and the someone shot it down with a shotgun, would they be breaking the law?

JPM said...

Furthermore, people who die in care homes or in their own residences are now not going to be recorded as having died of coronavirus.

So when the hospitals are overwhelmed, most of the toll will become unrecorded, and, likely unknowable for the future.

Where TF does anyone think that most people will die?

Along with hardly testing anyone, it's pretty clear what the game is now.

Span Ows said...

JiC: I was shooting pigeon officer.

JPM 10:26, quite right as they would probably have died of other (multiple in some cases) causes. Like D_G joked recently, the decapitaed motorcyclist was found to have corona virus so this was put as cause of death. Just how many of the deaths are "died with Covid-19” rather than “died fromCovid-19"? Normal flu deaths are TOTALLY 'unknowable' yet we have some numbers: 1500-2000 a WEEK (during winter months from flu, pneumonia and other respiratory related causes, Eng & Wales)

Span Ows said...

sok 09:35, indeed...and end March first half of April my favourite time of year!

Stephen J said...

@Span Ows: ref Dave_G....

Yes Dave made a good joke there.

By way of further discussion perhaps, if I may Raedwald, I have attached a URL that displays the co-morbidity associated with Covid-19.

I hope it is of some use to commenters, including Cheesy!

Span Ows said...

Stephen J. Great info. Thank you.

JPM said...

Aye, like they're turning conference centres and sports stadiums into emergency hospitals, with thousands of beds, for all those decapitated motorcyclists, eh?

And Spain has brought in the army, to cart away the corpses because the undertakers can't cope?

"Underlying conditions" include being a smoker and/or fat, incidentally.

Span Ows said...

So you didn't like Dave_G's joke then? Why do you think Germany's figures for deaths are so low? they don't include deaths where other conditions were the obvious main reason.

"Underlying conditions" include being a smoker and/or fat, incidentally.

Of course, smoking = respiratory problems (mostly/often). Being fat can mean hypertension (often)

Mark said...

"Underlying condition" can mean whatever you want it too. How about vegans or those pathological exercise halfwits who can't get by with their pharmaceutical factory of "supplements".

I'm not sure Orwell defined "bodycrime" but we've had it for a while now. I expect a few who are so keen on thought crime might be in for a surprise soon.

Dave_G said...

SO said "Why do you think Germany's figures for deaths are so low? they don't include deaths where other conditions were the obvious main reason."

Given the honesty of German reporting we should expect a sudden upturn in their deaths as they succumb to political pressure to show the 'proper numbers' as required to maintain the level of scaremongering.

Dave_G said...

Nearly 300 people A DAY die from all sorts of causes in London alone - never mind the rest of the UK.

I don't doubt for one minute that CV19 isn't killing people but as the SOLE CAUSE for their deaths?????

Influenza is a serious global health threat that impacts all countries: every year, there are an estimated 1 billion cases, 3-5 million severe cases, and 290,000-650,000 influenza-related respiratory deaths worldwide.

The above figures are from the WHO (not the rock group). My bold.

No lock downs, no hysteria, no financial effects (compared to the current crisis).

I say again, this 'crisis' is total MANUFACTURED hysterical BOLLOCKS that we have yet to discover the real reason behind. Personally I suspect a global economic reset and the introduction of a new global currency and/or digital solution. The virus isn't going to fuck us, the banks are - AGAIN.

Stephen J said...

Dave_G... I thought the purpose was to abolish cash money, with an added amuse-bouche of shutting down the majority of small businesses?

But you may be right there may well be stuff that has yet to be revaeled.

Stephen J said...

Of course, even my brandy noo buckiling spring keyboard can't cope with genuine syntax errors.

Anyway, at least it enters the keys that I press, albeit in the wrong order.

DeeDee99 said...

Is this meant to be humorous. It reads more like an instruction manual?

We are now effectively living in a police state.

Smoking Scot said...

There's been a great deal of bull talked about smoking from both sides. However this chap is so convinced that smoking will protect his loved ones that he has the whole lot, including sprogs, puffing away, while chanting away to him who should be praised.

Oh and vitamin C. Lots of people are on about the vitamin being a protector against getting the virus. Take your standard effervescent tablet every two hours and all you get is bright yellow, rather expensive willy water.

It is good for people who have the milder version of coronavirus, but it must be taken intravenously using vitamin C made for that purpose.

Anonymous said...

The purpose of the hysteria is to rob us of our pensions, and to pretend that it all our fault.

David Bishop said...

This via Perry de Havilland at Samizdata says it all:

jim said...

Mr Johnson is sending me a homily telling me to stay in more (I can't) and says he will cut up rough if I don't. I do have a few worry points. Food is one. I'm keeping at home and need to be confident that when I do venture out to forage there will be bread and eggs etc in the one and only supermarket. Which begs the question - what does Mr Johnson have in mind? Are we heading for troops on the streets, or ration books? Well Germany/France have not got to that and the Italians are a special case.

As a practical matter how do you implement rationing in the supermarket age? All a bit late when some violent chavs turn up at the checkout with two or three barrows laden. Armed troops on the exit?

We seem in a sticky position, how long can the economy stand the shutdown? In one sense this does not matter, every Western country is in deep doo doo. We will all rebase our economies and currencies to match. The Eastern economies will have to fit in or have no one to sell to. But I get the sense that sooner or later the thought of corporate collapses will force thoughts of taking off the lockdowns. Coordinating that with international borders and flights looks a mess.

Then we ask 'are the over 70's worth the cost of saving'. Politically yes, economically probably not, morally? Come 2025 such oldies as are left may be the only Tory voters unless Labour keeps up its current uselessness.

Dave_G said...

The current shopping limitations are ridiculous when, like me, you have a 50 mile round trip to the supermarkets and NEED to purchase 'in quantity'. Or do they expect me to shop on a daily basis?

Bill Sticker said...

Drones? Good catapult practice.